Noise

I'm starting to feel a little noise....

Once upon a time, my world was full of noise, both literally and figuratively. Teaching music class in a school with several hundred kids in it is sufficient to fill one's world with noise. Because of the stress of that, the noise carried over into my personal life as well. It seemed that everywhere the sounds of STUFF surrounded me, distracting me, filling up my ears and my head with the general buzz of the hive of humanity.

Yuck.

I can feel it coming back, little by little, insidiously.

It's my fault, and I need to stop it.  And so I will.

I am tooo emotionally tied up in this election. What would happen if I just let all that go, say **** it and just live where I live, in God's favorite (I think, but then again, you know He has lots of faves) place in the world?  Is that being irresponsible? I know when it gets to the point that it's keeping me up nights, and I am beating my head against the wall (figurately, for sure), and preaching only to a small small choir, maybe I need to let go.

And so I will.

I've been busy making stuff, and, I am pleased to say, making a little money, too. It's gratifying to know that people like my stuff.

But with busy-ness comes noise. I find myself needing to make lists to keep on top of my inventory needs, so instead of coming to work every day and saying, "What do I feel like making today?" it is more like, "What do I have to hurry up and make today?"

Noisy, noisy, noise!

Even being home on a lazy Sunday didn't help me today. Television noise downstairs, computer noise upstairs. It's time for hot chocolate or tea and sitting by the window wrapped in a warm shawl.

I'm ashamed at how little bird-watching has been going on lately, too

Or taking a drive deep into the quiet of the woods.

Stopping to take slow breaths of the silent cold air.

Or to feel the deep reflection of trees on the still water.

To watch the sky darken.



Or the moon rise.

To close my eyes, right now, as I am typing, and know that the noise is no one's fault, including mine, but also, that I do have the power to quiet it all by myself.

The seasons are telling me to step quietly through the woods and fields and along the shores that are my home.

To slow my steps and my breathing and my heart and my mind.

To stop listening to the noise, and to stop contributing to it myself.

I am so thankful to live in a world of seasons.



Thank You.

Amen.